First New Years without a loved one

The first New Year's without a loved one can be a difficult and emotional time. It may be hard to imagine celebrating the new year without the presence of someone who was a significant part of your life. The holiday season can bring up a range of emotions, including grief, sadness, and loneliness. The holidays are often a time when we gather with family and friends to celebrate and create memories and the absence of a loved one can be especially felt during these celebrations.

As the new year approaches, it's important to take care of yourself and allow yourself to feel and process emotions. It may be helpful to reach out to friends and family for support, or to seek guidance from a professional. Find healthy ways to cope with grief and loss, such as through writing, art and exercise.

People experiencing grief can feel overwhelmed and anxious as the new year approaches.  Take things at your own pace and don't feel obliged to RSVP to every invitation or event if the thought is overwhelming, sometimes spending time alone is what is needed.

There are no easy answers for how to cope with the first New Year's after losing a loved one. It's important to remember that everyone's experience of grief is unique, and there is no right way to grieve. Some people find comfort in staying busy and participating in traditional holiday activities, while others may prefer to spend the holiday quietly and reflect on their loved one's life.

Allow yourself to feel and express your emotions

It's natural to feel a range of emotions during the first New Year's without a loved one, including grief, sadness, and loneliness. Allow time to feel these emotions and to express them in a healthy way. This could include talking to a therapist, writing in a journal, or spending time with loved ones who can provide support.

Find ways to honour your loved one's memory

Consider finding ways to incorporate a loved one's memory into holiday celebrations. This could mean setting aside time to reflect on their life or creating a special tradition in their honour.

Create a new tradition or ritual

To honour a loved one on New Year's eve or New Year's Day. This can include, lighting a candle in their memory or writing a letter to them to express current feelings. Consider donating to a charity in their honour or volunteering to help others in need.

Set new year goals

Find ways to celebrate the new year and to look forward to the future, even in the midst of grief. This could be as simple as setting a goal or task for the new year to focus on. 

Spend time with friends and family

The first New Year's without a loved one is a challenging time and for some people they may feel alone in their grief. Spending time with family and friends can provide comfort, understanding and company over the holidays. 

Seek support

Don't be afraid to reach out for professional support during this difficult time. This can include talking to a therapist and joining a support group with people who are in similar situations. 

Take care of yourself 

It's important to take care of yourself physically and emotionally during the holiday season. This can include getting enough sleep, eating healthy meals, and finding ways to relax and destress and focus attention elsewhere. 

Be creative

Taking time to be creative can help express emotions over the New year period. Keep a journal of thoughts and feelings experienced during this time or write a letter to the person who has passed. Take the time to reflect and create something, whether it's a piece of art or a DIY project. Staying active by keeping up with physical activity can help refocus the mind, this can include going on a hike or yoga. 

Find meaning and purpose

It can be helpful to find meaning and purpose in the face of loss. This could mean volunteering, finding a new hobby, or setting goals for the new year. Finding purpose can provide a sense of direction and help a person feel more positive and hopeful about moving forward into the new year.

The most important thing is to find a way to honour your loved one's memory and to find meaning and purpose when faced with trauma and loss. This takes time, and it may involve trying out different approaches until you find what works for you. But with time and support, it is possible to move forward and find joy in the New Year, even in the absence of your loved one.

By Alana Dintinosante

Related articles:

How to cope with grief over the holidays

14 types of grief you can experience after loss

To find support:  

Beyond Blue provides Australians with information and support to improve their mental health. Call 1300 22 46 36 or visit beyondblue.org.au for more information.

Lifeline Australia provides Australians experiencing a personal crisis with access to 24-hour crisis support. Call 13 11 14 or visit lifeline.org.au for more information.

GriefLine listens, cares and supports people experiencing loss and grief, at any stage in life. Call 1300 845 6am to midnight AEST, 7 days a week.

MensLine Australia is a professional telephone and online support and information service for Australian men. Call 1300 78 99 78, 24 hours / 7 days a week.

Kids Helpline is a free 24/7, confidential and private counselling service Australia wide specifically for children and young people aged 5 to 25 years. Call 1800 55 1800.

Life Supports Counselling provides Australians with experienced counsellors & psychologists in their local area Australia-wide. Call 1300 735...