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How to cope with your first Christmas following a loss

Published: 13/12/2023

During this time, it's normal to feel a complex mix of emotions, from sadness and loneliness to nostalgia and even anger. You may wonder how you'll get through this holiday season, but remember, you're not alone. In this article, we offer you support and advice on dealing with your first Christmas after a loss.

Honouring their memory

Remembering the good times

The first Christmas after a loss is a perfect opportunity to celebrate the life and memories of your loved one. Share stories and anecdotes with family and friends, recalling the joyous moments you shared together. Doing so can help keep their memory alive and make the holiday season feel more meaningful.

Adjusting your traditions

Be open to change 

Try to be flexible and open to change during this time. If certain holiday customs feel too painful, don't hesitate to adjust or skip them altogether. Your well-being comes first during this time.

Starting new traditions 

Consider creating new traditions or modifying existing ones to honour your loved one. It could be as simple as cooking their favourite meal or watching their favourite movie. This can help you feel connected to them in a meaningful way.

How to cope with your first Christmas following a loss
How to cope with your first Christmas following a loss

Seek support from loved ones

Communicate your feelings

Don't hesitate to share your feelings with those close to you. Let them know what you need, whether it's someone to talk to or simply someone to sit in silence with. Your loved ones want to support you, but they may not know how unless you communicate your needs.

Lean on each other

Remember that others in your family may also be struggling with the loss. Lean on each other for support. Sharing your grief can help you feel less isolated and can bring you closer as a family.

RELATED ARTICLE: How to support someone experiencing grief

Self-care is essential 

Prioritise your well-being

Be sure to get enough rest, eat nourishing foods and engage in activities that bring you comfort and relaxation. This might be the perfect moment to indulge in a hobby or take up a new one.

Prioritise your well-being

Be sure to get enough rest, eat nourishing foods and engage in activities that bring you comfort and relaxation. This might be the perfect moment to indulge in a hobby or take up a new one.

Connect with supportive resources 

How to cope with your first Christmas following a loss
How to cope with your first Christmas following a loss

Therapy and counselling 

Professional help can be invaluable in navigating the complexities of grief during the holiday season. Consider seeking support from a therapist or counsellor who specialises in grief and loss who can provide you with tools to support healing and cope effectively.

Support groups

Joining a grief support group, whether in person or online, can connect you with people who understand what you're going through. Sharing experiences and coping strategies with others can be incredibly comforting.

RELATED ARTICLE: Podcasts about grief and loss

Embrace your feelings

Allow yourself to grieve

It's important to acknowledge your emotions, even the difficult ones. If you need to cry or get angry, it's okay. These emotions are all part of the healing process.

Mindfulness and mediation 

Practising mindfulness and meditation can help you stay present and manage overwhelming emotions. These techniques can provide you with a sense of peace and clarity during a challenging time.

Set boundaries

It's okay to decline invitations or commitments that feel too emotionally challenging on you. Instead ,put your well-being first and set boundaries that protect your emotional health.

Communicate your needs

Politely communicate your boundaries to others. Most people will understand and respect your decision to take things at your own pace during this challenging time.   You are not alone in your grief, and your feelings are valid. Be patient with yourself and take one step at a time. The healing process may be slow, but with time and support, you will find your way through this challenging holiday season.   

To find support:    

Beyond Blue provides Australians with information and support to improve their mental health. Call 1300 22 46 36 or visit beyondblue.org.au for more information.    

Lifeline Australia provides Australians experiencing a personal crisis with access to 24-hour crisis support. Call 13 11 14 or visit lifeline.org.au for more information.    

GriefLine listens, cares and supports people experiencing loss and grief, at any stage in life. Call 1300 845 6am to midnight AEST, 7 days a week.    

MensLine Australia is a professional telephone and online support and information service for Australian men. Call 1300 78 99 78, 24 hours / 7 days a week.    

Kids Helpline is a free 24/7, confidential and private counselling service Australia wide specifically for children and young people aged 5 to 25 years. Call 1800 55 1800.    

Life Supports Counselling provides Australians with experienced counsellors & psychologists in their local area Australia-wide. Call 1300 735

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