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Celebration of life vs wake: What is the difference?

Published: 8/8/2023
celebration of life vs traditional wake
celebration of life vs traditional wake

Honouring legacy through modern traditions

Losing a beloved family member or friend is an experience that brings forth a wave of challenging emotions. As you navigate the journey of commemorating their life, you may encounter various options for honouring their memory. Among these choices you might consider are a  celebration of life and traditional wake.  

In this article, we will delve into the distinctions between the two approaches, providing insight into their individual characteristics. 

Embracing the celebration of life

A celebration of life is a beautiful avenue through which you can honour your loved one's memory. This approach emphasises their unique personality, accomplishments and the positive influence they had on others. It serves as a joyous gathering that pays tribute to the spirit of their life rather than dwelling solely on the sadness of their passing. This option invites you to treasure the cherished memories and celebrate the moments of happiness shared with your loved one.

Understanding the traditional wake in a modern context

Contrary to its old-school perception, a traditional wake can take on new dimensions in modern society. It is a more customary approach to mourning and commemorating your loved one's life. Traditionally characterised by sombre and formal gatherings, often held at a funeral home or the family's residence, the modern traditional wake carries the potential for transformation into a celebration of life. Such a gathering can integrate elements of remembrance and celebration while respecting established customs and traditions.  

RELATED ARTICLE: What is a living wake? A guide to a meaningful celebration of life

Tone and atmosphere 

Celebration of life 

Opting for a celebration of life infuses the atmosphere with positivity and gratitude for the life that was lived. This choice encourages you to focus on the joyful moments, shared laughter, and treasured memories with your loved one. By adopting this approach, you commemorate them as they were in life, celebrating their passions, accomplishments and the love they spread.

Traditional wake 

A modern traditional wake still retains a reflective and solemn tone, but it also acknowledges the beauty of the life that was lived. While the atmosphere may be solemn, it holds the space for expressions of love, fond remembrances and support for the bereaved family. The modern interpretation recognises that even within the context of tradition, there is room for celebrating the legacy left behind.

Format and activities 

Celebration of life 

A celebration of life often adopts a less structured format, allowing for flexibility and personalisation. Venues can range from favourite parks and beaches to family homes. The emphasis lies in creating an environment conducive to storytelling, memory sharing and interaction. Guests may engage in activities that mirror the unique passions or hobbies of your loved one, fostering an atmosphere of joy and remembrance.

Traditional wake 

In contrast, a modern traditional wake maintains a structured framework, often incorporating religious or cultural customs. Commonly held at designated spaces for mourning or at funeral homes, these gatherings serve as a place for offering condolences, participating in prayers or rituals and sharing memories in a respectful manner.  

RELATED ARTICLE:Organising a wake: A Guide for You

 

celebration of life vs traditional wake
celebration of life vs traditional wake

Dress code and attire

Celebration of life 

The attire for a celebration of life is often more flexible, reflecting the unique style and personality of your loved one. This approach presents an opportunity to dress in a way that honours their individuality and preferences.

Traditional wake 

In a modern traditional wake, the dress code maintains a level of formality and respect. Guests typically don dark or muted colours as a gesture of mourning and to show solidarity with the grieving family.

Personalisation and individuality 

Celebration of life 

A celebration of life is centred around personalisation. This approach encourages you to incorporate elements that reflect your loved one's individuality, such as their favourite music, hobbies and achievements. It allows you to create a tribute that genuinely captures their essence.

Traditional wake 

While modern traditional wakes may include personal touches, they often maintain a strong adherence to established customs and rituals. This focus ensures that the gathering provides comfort and support to the grieving family and serves as a space for collective remembrance.  

RELATED ARTICLE:What is a celebration of life service?

The significance of shared stories and memories 

Celebration of life 

Within a celebration of life, the sharing of stories and memories takes centre stage. It is a time to gather with loved ones and reminisce about the joyful moments and meaningful experiences shared with your loved one. Each story woven into this tapestry becomes a testament to their impact on the lives they touched, offering comfort and healing to those who remember them.

Traditional wake 

Likewise, a modern traditional wake provides an opportunity for storytelling and the sharing of memories. Attendees often come together to offer condolences and support. Through these stories, solace is found in collective remembrance, serving as a testament that the legacy of your loved one lives on through the shared experiences and memories of those who knew them.  

 

celebration of life vs traditional wake
celebration of life vs traditional wake

RELATED ARTICLE: How do you start a eulogy speech?

Honouring individual wishes and values 

Celebration of life 

Opting for a celebration of life enables you to honour your loved one's individual wishes and values. It allows you the flexibility to craft an event that resonates with their beliefs, passions, and interests. Whether it involves integrating their favourite activities, music, or special rituals, you have the freedom to curate a celebration that reflects their unique spirit.

Traditional wake 

In a modern traditional wake, the focus remains on upholding established customs and religious or cultural traditions. This approach offers the opportunity to pay homage to the values that were meaningful to your loved one and their family. The structure and rituals associated with a traditional wake provide a sense of familiarity and comfort throughout the mourning process.  

While a celebration of life allows you to honour your loved one's unique journey in a flexible and personalised manner, a modern traditional wake bridges the gap between tradition and celebration. It acknowledges the potential for finding joy and solace within the structure of established customs.  

Ultimately, the choice between a celebration of life and a traditional wake is deeply personal and should be aligned with what feels most authentic to your loved one and your family. This choice reflects the way you wish to celebrate their life, find solace in the support of others and create a lasting tribute that preserves their memory for generations to come.

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